Male, 50

The real reason i keep cheating. i know its wrong and i feel guilty after everytime. i go through depression after but a few months ago when i hooked up with a married man in his house i had my first ever a*al orgasm during the s*x. i let two men c*m in me last weekend to see if that would. i came with the second one but i was on top of him.think it was because we were thrusting forward. and this morning in a park i had s*x with another married man in my car. a car drove past us as he was f*c*ing me and i honestly did not care. luckily the car did not stop but after i found myself frustrated guilty and ashamed. i need to stop but i have been so obsessed with wanting to c*m during the s*x i am risking everything including my health and marriage not to mention screwing with my s*xuality.